SilverTidalWave

I'm sorry, and I shouldn't have to apologise for this, but you, BigBlackEyes and Tigrantia really, really hurt me, similar to how Chrystal did actually. To be honest, you've hurt me the most out of the three of you My whole life, all I'd really ever wanted was a real friend. I thought you guys were it.

Oh well. Now I have muriyh. She cares about my feelings, knows how ill I've been, supported me through my illness, my depression, the days were I just lay waiting to die until I started seeing my therapists. Do you know how many hours I've lay on my bathroom floor crying over OCD shit? Do you know how severely fucked up my head's been? No. I don't think I ever even told you this Manda but once I did actually attempt suicide back when you still talked to me. But I knew our friendship was coming to an end and it was dying. I tried to keep it going as long as I could but... It's ever since you got wrapped up in school and boyfriends. I know, for you that's life, but I'm autistic and I have OCD. What do you think life is for me? It's pretty lonely you know. I didn't realise it until someone asked me and god, it's actually true. I mean the only friend I had before Mariah, and she was the best friend I could have dreamed of having, and OCD made me cut all ties with her. I lost her to my OCD. And until I met Mariah I did used to miss her like hell.

Anyway, I'm sorry if you all think I'm an arse, but I'm hurt. You've done this. And Tigs I can't even try and patch things up with because everyone irl has advised me not to. She's always uad her own problems. But you? Little miss perfect life? Gimme a break.

I'm just writing an Email to my real life best friend who was always a much better, sincere and genuine friend than you. Here are the paragraphs that concern you. I have copy pasted them for your enjoyment.

'I really wonder, as we are on the subject of JKR, what my brother thinks. It's just because he is so intelligent (more so than me!) and I really do value his opinion but I just can't fathom that he would be able to read and actually enjoy such rubbish. As I've said, I tried tirelessly and JKR's material bored me, however what other people created based off her work managed to inspire me. Ugh, this just makes me think of Manda and feel angry. Maybe Manda was never really a proper friend. The 'friendship' was dying off for years really and I tried my best to cling to it. I think Manda's Mum was strict over school and didn't want 'distractions' and also Manda got a boyfriend so... Manda's boyfriend published an Ebook actually, that she edited. I found this out by googling them. This Ebook, Mariah and I had a good laugh over, because it was just awful. We only had the Amazon preview and needless to say we did not purchase! It was just so crap, dull, generic.

Ugh. I hate JKR so much. I hope when she dies Satan roasts her. I'd join him. You'd think, as I was inspired as a child by HP I'd be grateful to the woman. Nope. Only someone like Manda would expect me to bow down and worship mighty JKR. It wasn't what she did that inspired me. It was the film, the video game. What other people built from JKR's shit shavings.'

And you know something Manda? I hope Satan roasts you along with your precious favourite author. After the hurt you have caused me, FUCK YOU!

You know what, I'm angry right now so I'm going to say this to you so I don't say anything to upset anyone more important.

HARRY POTTER SUCKS. It always has sucked. It always will suck. JKR's writing sucks. JKR is just lucky that someone came along and made a good film, from which someone else made a good video game. That is literally it. I don't even remember reading the books because I skipped great big boring chunks.

And also, you're sucky too. You're a terrible 'friend'. You strung along some poor mentally ill autistic girl for years, pretending like you had this great bond and connection, but of course school and boyfriends were always more important. But if you came online once a year I'd drop EVERYTHING that was going on in my life to talk to you, only for you to just send emojis back and forth because you can't be bothered to properly converse with me and I'm to socially inept to ever say anything.

Fuck you. And fuck your precious Potter. I hope you're both very happy together.

Please understand, it's not that I'm ungrateful for the years of friendship, I'm just wondering if any of it was genuine.

I auppose you might send me a message on Kik next week, like you always do, but I never wanted yearly messages from you wishing me a happy birthday, I always just wanted to talk to you properly because I thought we were friends and we had a special bond and connection. Thanks for stringing me along for years only to do this to me now. You suck.

Happy Birthday! I'll miss you, and I hope you are happy where ever you may be. 

Hi there, how have you been? I feel as if it's been an eternity.