I'm sorry, and I shouldn't have to apologise for this, but you,
BigBlackEyes and
Tigrantia really, really hurt me, similar to how Chrystal did actually. To be honest, you've hurt me the most out of the three of you My whole life, all I'd really ever wanted was a real friend. I thought you guys were it.
Oh well. Now I have
muriyh. She cares about my feelings, knows how ill I've been, supported me through my illness, my depression, the days were I just lay waiting to die until I started seeing my therapists. Do you know how many hours I've lay on my bathroom floor crying over OCD shit? Do you know how severely fucked up my head's been? No. I don't think I ever even told you this Manda but once I did actually attempt suicide back when you still talked to me. But I knew our friendship was coming to an end and it was dying. I tried to keep it going as long as I could but... It's ever since you got wrapped up in school and boyfriends. I know, for you that's life, but I'm autistic and I have OCD. What do you think life is for me? It's pretty lonely you know. I didn't realise it until someone asked me and god, it's actually true. I mean the only friend I had before Mariah, and she was the best friend I could have dreamed of having, and OCD made me cut all ties with her. I lost her to my OCD. And until I met Mariah I did used to miss her like hell.
Anyway, I'm sorry if you all think I'm an arse, but I'm hurt. You've done this. And Tigs I can't even try and patch things up with because everyone irl has advised me not to. She's always uad her own problems. But you? Little miss perfect life? Gimme a break.